Yik Yak Attack: Week three

Henry St. Pierre
Connector Staff

This is week three of the Yik Yak Attack section of the Connector, and this means three times the fun! Just kidding, this section’s always lots of fun. It’s been another week of humorous, grotesque, and disturbing Yaks, and I have once again had the privilege of weeding out some of the best posts for Connector-reading humans to enjoy. There are no standard criteria for these posts whatsoever and bias is completely in play, but I do the work by scrolling on my phone so I make the decisions.

Perhaps your Yak made the list. If it did, props to me for including it. Let’s begin!

(You know the disclaimer by now, but its my obligation to note that the truly extreme Yaks cant exactly be posted. I also leave any grammatical or spelling errors, as they are to ensure truthful reporting. Also, I censor any Yak that needs to be censored because this is a university newspaper and not your dads barbershop.)

 

“A white girl saw her shadow today which means six more weeks of pumpkin spiced lattes”

“It’s weird how British people say ‘lift’ instead of ‘elevator’ just like how my dad says ‘you’re a disappointment’ instead of ‘I love you’.”

“I don’t go to school here I’m just a construction worker but I have to say you guys are all out of your minds.”

“I got 99 problems and their all due at 11:59pm”

“UML>IOS8”

“UML>Amherst”

“UML>Harvard”

“UML > the moon”

“a rare species: a student walking to an 8am with a smile on their face”

“UML is more of a wifi-free campus than it is a smoke-free campus”

“Shout out to the kid that burst into our class 20 minutes late all sweaty, asked when our paper was due and when the teacher said next Tuesday just got up and left #NoF***sGiven”

“That moment when u see a girl walk into a pole as she is trying to take a selfie>>>”

“Professor who make C the correct answer 5 times in a row, you’re the reason why I have trust issues.”

“Don’t expect me to be mature if you have a white board on your door”

“Today’s been great! Girls keep winking at me, with both their eyes”

“Due on Monday. Do on Monday”

“My professor told us he likes to stay up until midnight to watch students miss the deadline. Chill out satan”

“Just watched a girl google “can you get pregnant through your jeans”… WTF YOU ARE IN COLLEGE”

“Yo construction worker, why you watering the bridge?”

“If only 15 minutes could save me 15% or more on my exam grade”

“today I had to inform my roommate that dry shampoo, deodorant, and a lot of perfume isn’t the same as a shower. he hasn’t showered in 2 weeks”

“If you high school tour groups wana see what this college is really like, just scroll on yik yak.”

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